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Sex without love

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's a pretty good empty experience.

Woody Allen

Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right. (Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex) That [sex] was the most fun I ever had without laughing. (Annie Hall) Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love. (Annie Hall)

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best. Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful - provided you get between the right man and the right woman. My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. Love is the answer - but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions. I'm such a good lover because I practise a lot on my own. The food in this place is really terrible. Yes, and such small portions. That's essentially how I feel about life. (Annie Hall) If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever. (Love and Death) I'm short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own. (Play it Again Sam) I'm really a timid person - I was beaten up by Quakers. (Sleepers) My brain - it's my second favorite organ. (Sleeper) Q. Have you ever taken a serious political stand on anything? A. Yeah. Sure. For twenty-four hours once I refused to eat grapes. (Sleeper) Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it. (Getting Even, 'My Philosophy') Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends. (New Yorker, 'My Philosophy') The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. (Without Feathers, 'The Scrolls') It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens. (Death) The thing to remember is that each time of life has its appropriate rewards, whereas when you're dead it's hard to find the light switch.  The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who have bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it's being held. On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. (The Early Essays) Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. (The Early Essays) I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of another boy. (Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor) My parents were very old world. They come from Brooklyn, which is the heart of the Old World. Their values in life are God and carpeting. (Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor) I have never been an intellectual but I have this look. A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to sleep with me and she said 'no'. (Woody Allen Volume Two) I am at two with nature. (Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor)  Some guy hit my fender, and I told him 'be fruitful, and multiply.' But not in those words. (Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor) I wanted to be an arch-criminal as a child, before I discovered I was too short. (Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor)  I asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did. Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted for an only child. (Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor) And my parents finally realize that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they rent out my room. (Woody Allen and His Comedy)

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else. (Woody Allen and His Comedy)  Death is an acquired trait. (Woody Allen and His Comedy) I don't want to achieve immortality through my work…I want to achieve it through not dying. (Woody Allen and His Comedy)

I took a speed reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia. (Quote and Unquote) Take the money and run. (Film title) If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. (Selections from the Allen Notebooks, New Yorker) On bisexuality: It immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. (New York Times) I recently turned sixty. Practically a third of my life is over. (Sayings of the Week, Observer) I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers. Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declared you legally insane in order to gain control of your estate. The baby is fine. The only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson. I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's so hard to find your way around Chinatown. How can I believe in God when justlast week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? I sold the memoirs of my sex life to a publisher - they are going to make a board game out of it. Basically my wife was immature. I'd be in my bath and she'd come in and sink my boats. If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips. The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers. I do not believe in an after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear. If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans. If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative. There are two types of people in this world: good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more . More than any time in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly. What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought - particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things. 94.5% of all statistics are made up. Why ruin a good story with the truth? Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously. It is impossible to travel faster than light and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off... I failed to make the chess team because of my height.  Sex between 2 people is a beautiful thing. Between 5, it's fantastic.  I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch. I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.

Convicting the wrong guy

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Part 2:


The Innocent Man The Innocent Man: Murder and Injustice in a Small Town is the first nonfiction book written by John Grisham